Leaving in August 28th

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ISHB1SH's avatar
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I decided to join the air force to help me financially.

My family is struggling and I cant rely on working so many hours to get by.
I would have loved to live on my own but I can't leave my parents with so much stress.

I know I tell everyone that I want to plan stuff with them when I'm free... (and I really do)
but every time I get a free week people call of work that I need to take or someone needs my help with something IRL and then I have a busy schedule all of a sudden.

The problem with me is that I can't say NO.
I act TOO sympathetic or nice where it comes off so many ways and I'm now learning to do what's best for me.
and now I feel more real with myself.

I'm learning to not agree with everything someone says
I'm learning to speak my own thoughts even tho majority disagree
I'm learning to take action when im wrong and change it
I'm fixing old relationships that I wish I had caused my young bitter self was extremely ugly who talked so much and couldn't worry about myself but others.
OR
My younger self was too insecure.

I've learned so much these past 3 months that if I saw myself in 2017-March 2018, I would punched him.

I'm sorry to those who feel like im ignoring you right now.
But I have to take care of my family.
I'll always be there for others if they need me and I'll will always listen.

But I just need to keep my priorities on my lifestyle.
It sounds selfish but idk why it feels the right thing to do?
I at least do my best to catch up on you guys but I can't respond fast enough so i'm sorry about that.

RN I'm preparing myself for what's coming

Anyways before this goes into a longer Journal.
I'll be leaving on August 28th and Ill be back home in December 14th
This experience will change my life so much, and im excited.

but I promise I won't come back as a confederate, Donald Trump supporter speaking stupid gibberish.
Like Amberly

© 2018 - 2024 ISHB1SH
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DeathKissuFu's avatar
Kyle I am so damn proud of you to take such a huge step in life in pursuing as a soldier. It is not selfish at all and believe me I know your struggles, wanting to help your family, not leaving them alone. You had told me a lot that's been going on...me and you have so much in common when it comes to family and wanting to do best for them.
;^; it's not easy but I believe you're going to do amazing ny gosh I am so happy for you. Being nice is a great feeling and helping others but sometimes us as nice individuals, need to think & care about ourselves too (I still am going to owe you that favor). Being an adult has opened many of our eyes that we didn't understand much when we were small. Our parents has helped us and now it is time for us to help them :heart:
I wish you the best of everything and I know you'll go so far with this.